


Of sushi and insecurities

by cian1675



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Communication, Developing Relationship, M/M, Mostly Fluff, Slice of Life, kyungsoo's not very good with verbalising his feelings and affection, soft, some insecurity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-28
Updated: 2017-07-28
Packaged: 2018-12-08 01:43:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11636337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cian1675/pseuds/cian1675
Summary: “W-what if he doesn’tlikeme?”Sehun’s voice is tight, a little high and pitchy. Kyungsoo blinks, stops his hand from knocking on Sehun's door without thinking.[Or, the AU where Kyungsoo and Sehun are dating and Kyungsoo's trying to surprise Sehun with food only to overhear his insecurities.]





	Of sushi and insecurities

**Author's Note:**

> Jo helped while I was sort of insecure about this fic and stuck with summaries and titles, so, thank you so much :)

Kyungsoo has takeout sushi swinging from a bag; there’s a light spring in his step. It’s not often that he feels content like this – a kind of dizzying lightness – and Kyungsoo can’t wait to get to Sehun’s dorm room to surprise him. The idea had come to him a little earlier, to pop by his boyfriend’s place with his favourite food for no reason other than because he suddenly felt like it. It’s spontaneous, something Kyungsoo isn’t normally good at, but then he’d decided there wasn’t really any harm in going along with it. Sehun had seemed a little worried the last few days and Kyungsoo thinks this may help brighten up his day.

Heart filled with anticipation, Kyungsoo reaches Sehun’s dorm. He’s about to knock when he notices the door is slightly ajar. He frowns. But then, a soft voice – Sehun’s – comes from inside. Maybe Sehun had just left his door open for ventilation, Kyungsoo thinks. He’s about to go ahead and knock anyway, announce his (surprise) presence, but then he hears –

“W-what if he doesn’t _like_ me?”

Sehun’s voice is tight, a little high and pitchy. Kyungsoo blinks, stops his hand from touching the door without thinking. There’s silence for a moment and then Sehun speaks again, his voice smaller than before –

 “I… I don’t know, man. It’s not that easy to tell. You know he doesn’t show his feelings very outwardly…”

Kyungsoo stares at the door, an image of Sehun biting his lower lip suddenly clear in his head. He can imagine how Sehun looks right now, brows knitted, knees pulled to his chest as he sits on his bed, a phone pressed to his ear. He thinks he knows who Sehun’s talking about –

“I just. Like him a lot, you know? I don’t know if I’m being too much –”

It’s him. Sehun’s talking about him. Kyungsoo. His stomach suddenly feels uneasy. Still frozen outside the room, Kyungsoo takes in a deep breath, considering his options. He could turn around now, pretend he hadn’t heard any of this. Or, he could knock, tell Sehun he’d overheard and ask him about it properly, face to face. It doesn’t take long for him to decide. Kyungsoo knocks.

“Sehun? Are you in?”

There’s a scramble, what sounds like a rushed “talk to you later,” and then Sehun’s at the door, fringe messy over his eyes, face slightly flushed like he had gotten to the door as fast as he could.

“K-kyungsoo? What are you doing here?” Sehun’s barely finished his sentence before he’s quickly adding, “Not that I’m not glad to see you, but I’m just… surprised. Yeah. Surprised.”

He looks flustered, if Kyungsoo’s being honest, and he wants to reach out to soothe him but he doesn’t know if that’s the best idea right now. So instead, Kyungsoo holds up the bag of sushi, says –

“I got you sushi.”

Sehun blinks at the takeout for a moment – Kyungsoo’s hands gets clammy – but he steps back in his room, a silent invitation for Kyungsoo to come in. There’s a small smile on his lips.

“That’s nice. Are we… sharing?”

Now that he’d overheard what Sehun had said, Kyungsoo notices the darting glances Sehun gives, the slightly hunched posture he has and the way he holds himself back like he’s trying to give Kyungsoo space. It feels…

Wrong.

It feels _wrong_.

Kyungsoo doesn’t notice he hasn’t replied Sehun’s question until he sees Sehun open and close his mouth a few times without saying anything and before his brain catches up to his mouth, Kyungsoo finds himself saying –

“Actually, I overheard your phone conversation just now. Accidentally, of course, like I was just outside and I… heard. Yeah.”

Sehun doesn’t say anything, so Kyungsoo finds himself asking, “Was it… Is it… about me?”

Sehun nods, the movement almost imperceptible. Kyungsoo swallows.

“Oh.” He looks at his shoes, still on even though he had taken a step past the threshold. “Uhm…”

“I… really like you,” Sehun says quietly. “A lot, actually.”

Kyungsoo’s heart skips a beat.

“But sometimes,” Sehun continues softly – hesitantly – “I’m worried that I’m bothering you. You just seem more… relaxed about this whole relationship, I think. Sometimes I feel like I’m the one who’s really excited to see you, and sometimes you say I talk too much. But I didn’t want to annoy you by being that insecure boyfriend so I didn’t really tell you. But at the same time… I… I don’t know.”

His eyes don’t meet Kyungsoo’s, and Kyungsoo’s chest tightens.

“Sehun –”

He reaches for Sehun’s hand tentatively; Sehun lets him curl his fingers around his.

“We’re in a relationship. It’s okay to talk about this.”

Sehun peeks at him from under his fringe, his eyes hopeful. _Too_ hopeful, Kyungsoo thinks, like he hadn’t been expecting this of Kyungsoo, and that’s what hurts him more.

“Sehun…”

The words don’t come to him easily; Kyungsoo swings the bag of sushi he’s holding on to because his other hand is still around Sehun’s and he can’t worry his nails like he wants to.

“Sehun, I’m sorry I made you feel that way. I actually really really like you too, or I wouldn’t be dating you, but I guess… I’m not very good at showing that.”

Sehun’s back to hiding his eyes, and Kyungsoo’s not sure that that’s the reaction he had been expecting. But then he realises Sehun’s breaths are slightly hitched and –

“Are you… crying?”

Sehun’s head bobs a little lower, his fingers tightening around Kyungsoo’s. He doesn’t know what to do especially when both his hands are occupied, so Kyungsoo ends up stepping closer. Sehun lowers his forehead to Kyungsoo’s shoulder naturally, and Kyungsoo feels the wet seep of tears.

“I’m… sorry?” Kyungsoo tries, not entirely sure what to say.

“I-I’m not crying ‘cause I’m sad, idiot,” Sehun mumbles, his words lost in the folds of Kyungsoo’s jacket. Kyungsoo has to crane his neck to try to look at him.

“Wait, what?”

“You said you really _really_ like me too,” Sehun replies, voice oddly petulant despite the fact that he’s still crying, breaths hitched.

Kyungsoo wriggles his hand out from Sehun’s, uses it to coax Sehun to look at him. He’s not sure what he wants to say – what he wants to say _first_ – but his mouth has already opened.

“Did you think I didn’t?”

“I… I don’t know.” Sehun’s lashes are spikey with tears and his nose is red. Kyungsoo’s overcome with the urge to wipe his snot off for him.

“Please tell me your self-esteem isn’t so low that you’ll date someone who you think doesn’t love you.”

Kyungsoo tries to soften his words, phrase it like a question, but he’s aware once it comes out that it doesn’t really. Sehun looks at him with wide eyes.

“Of course not.” Sehun turns away, sniffs before continuing, “But sometimes… it’s easy to wonder if I’m being too much, burdening you with how much more enthusiastic I am.”

Kyungsoo inhales a long breath.

“I… you’re not bothering me. If anything, I’m really happy you like me so much? And if I ever feel uncomfortable in any way, I’ll tell you, so please don’t worry about this. Just be yourself.”

His words seem inadequate, so Kyungsoo strokes Sehun’s cheek with the thumb still against his face, bringing Sehun to face him once more. And then he tries again.

“I’m serious about this, Sehun. I know I’m not the best at showing how I feel but I do like you. I just want you to know that.”

Kyungsoo licks his lips, wondering if there’s something else he can say. But then Sehun reaches for his other arm, brings up Kyungsoo’s hand holding on to sushi and smiles.

“I’ll take this as your way of saying you like me.”

There’re still tear tracks on Sehun’s cheeks and his breath still comes out hitched but his smile is brighter now, his eyes twinkling, and Kyungsoo finds a little bit of his earlier lightheartedness coming back.

“Will you be okay with that?”

Sehun kisses his cheek, a short peck that’s too fast for Kyungsoo to even react.

“Yes. I like you a lot, remember?”

Kyungsoo smiles. “And so do I, you should remember that too.”

Sehun takes the bag of sushi from him.

“I will. And also, don’t think you’re special because I like sushi a lot too.”

Kyungsoo laughs.

“Sure. Now I’m jealous.”

Sehun sticks his tongue out at him, stepping backwards into his room. Kyungsoo still has to take off his shoes so he lets him go, watching Sehun hold the bag of sushi like a trophy.

“Brat,” Kyungsoo says, but it comes out way too soft and affectionate. By the desk where he’s setting down the takeout container, Sehun’s lips curl up in the corners.

“Is that an endearment?”

Kyungsoo finds himself smiling.

“What do you think?”

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted some fluff, and this isn't really fluff exactly but it's soft (I hope). Honestly, Kyungsoo and Sehun are so soft but somehow I tend to plot/write ambiguous sesoo fics or angst and those don't go anywhere ._. Then again, I've been generally stuck with writing recently... Anyway, constructive feedback is always welcomed, and I'll love to know what you think :)
> 
> Feel free to come talk to me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/cian1675) or [tumblr](https://stillcian1675.tumblr.com/)~


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